I am pretty sure I have a stalker.

Ok, so in reality it’s probably not a stalker, but what happened was still pretty creepy.

Last week I wrote about how commercialized Valentine’s Day is and that “romantic” gestures impress me more when they happen on other days of the year.  

This past Wednesday as I was finishing some stuff up for The Chart, Olive, our advisor, gave me a package I had received in the mail earlier in the week.  

It was addressed directly to me with my title and everything from an address somewhere in Utah.

Creepy right?

When I opened it, out fell two different packages of flavored Chap Stick, one business card and a card filled with kissing tips.

According to this card, you are supposed to mix the different flavors of the lip balm to “ramp up the romance.”

What the heck?

I have never in my whole entire life even been to Utah, known someone who lives or has visited Utah. I have never bought, researched or heard of this product. There was no letter, no explanation but just some weird business card from some company I have never heard of.

Who does that?

Olive thinks it was because of last week’ s column, like they were trying to change my opinion about it or something. So they thought a card that tells you “your tongue is a tool not a weapon,” would miraculously change my mind?

Regardless, I still think its super weird and completely unnecessary.

Here you have some random dude in Utah somehow knowing about The Chart enough to read it and stumble across my column, then think, “I bet I can change her mind,” takes the time to look up not only my name again, but the address of Missouri Southern, which by the way is 1,270.3 miles away.

It was in some kind of protective packaging that I’m sure he had to buy, along with stamps, as well as printing the address labels and then finally sending it off in the mail.

That seems like a total waste of time and extremely creepy.

So if you don’t hear from me in a while or someone notices Jordan Larimore’s acting a little too single or Taylor Camden is making bad life decisions then please put my face on a milk carton because I’ve probably been kidnapped.