Men and Women not so different

Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, right? Wrong.

The fact is, we’re both from the same planet – Earth. Perpetrating the idea that men and women are “complete opposites” is ridiculous; and divisive.

Case in point, my ex. No matter what dispute we were having – or even if we weren’t having one – he’d insist on bringing up sex. Not the “roll-in-the-hay” kind, but the biological-difference kind.

Our “arguments” (which I usually didn’t know we were having) would go something like this: I’d say something and then he’d search for the real meaning behind what I said. Because, according to him, women “overanalyze everything” and never say what they mean.

Uh, I say what I mean. But of course I’m an individual, not a stereotype.

I remember one time in particular when he picked out a movie for us to watch. The movie was P.S. I Love You and it sucked, to say the least. I really wanted to watch No Country for Old Men. But of course, being a woman, I must like sappy romance films. (To be fair, my ex’s movie choice was a sweet gesture, trying to pick something I’d like to watch.)

My first red flag, however, should have been before we started dating. We were having a discussion on the merits, or lack of, in the public-school system. The “discussion” was getting pretty intense when my ex pulled out his sexist trump card:

“You’re being completely illogical because you’re a woman,” he said. “That’s what you women do – you’re emotional.”

This, of course, made me emotional. Not in the hurt, weepy kind of way, but in the “my-face-is-hot-I’m-so-mad” kind of way.

Looking back, I realize he wasn’t completely to blame for his sexist stereotyping. I mean, our culture is full of it. Whether it’s Desperate Housewives portraying men as simple and women as overanalyzing connivers, or Katy Perry singing, “You change you mind like a girl changes clothes. You PMS like a bitch, I should know,” our society loves to play-up the differences between men and women.

Another culprit in the “battle of the sexes” is the English language itself. Notice almost every word used to describe a virtuous or not-so-virtuous individual is female. Ho, slut, bitch, whore, harlot, prostitute, maid, virgin and the infamous c-word, are all references to the fairer sex. To make the words masculine, simply put “man” in front of the female reference – as in “man-whore.”

So guys, when you’re taking “applications” from potential girlfriends, don’t start your search off with the phrase, “I want a girl who’s …”. And definitely don’t go on to list irrelevant, sexist qualifications like “must wear lingerie.”

Once you find your dream girl, don’t insult her by assuming she likes Miley Cyrus. When she’s upset, do not ask if she’s on her period.

I hope I don’t sound like a bitter feminist. I’m not. Stereotypes against men are just as dangerous. Women assuming that all men are simple, sexist pigs is just as wrong.

My point is, instead of seeing the “differences” when looking at someone of the opposite sex, strive to see the similarities. The truth is, men and women are more alike than different.